SARA NILES. Author and Social Media Influencer. Books, Essays, Social Awareness The lives we live determine our passions, and our passions impact the lives we live, in a dynamic, reciprocal pattern. My Life inspired me to write Memoirs: TORN From the Inside Out, The Journey, Out of the Maelstrom, Essays, Opinion Editorials, and social narratives that shed light during dark times.
Sunday, January 12, 2014
Domestic Violence and Homicide: A Deadly Problem by Sara Niles
I have been a
victim of domestic violence, as I came close to becoming a domestic homicide
statistic; front page news in a small town that would have been quickly, and
soon, forgotten. After my escape from my own homicidal maniac, many years
later, I worked for a domestic violence agency, first at the shelter as a counselor,
later as a Trainer. I remember that one
of my co-workers, a long time veteran of domestic violence work, once said “They
always get worse when the weather is hot, or during the holidays”, meaning
incents of abuse increased during those times, as evidenced by the influx of
shelter clients.
When a man, or woman, who is prone to exact his or
her own vengeance upon the world by punishing their private victims, is placed
under extra external stress, they intensify their abuse upon others. There is
no excuse for abuse, but for an abuser, any excuse will do. People who have
made a life of bullying their intimate partners, and/or children, run the gamut
from verbal violence, to physical homicide.
No matter how painful emotional abuse is, it can be
survived, the victim can move on and grow; but no one survives homicide.
22 year-old man kills his 23 year-old wife, and as
she lay dying he yells “I love you, wake up"
Herald Sun (Jan. 11, 2014)
Peoria, Illinois had 19 homicides in the year 2013,
4 of them were a direct result of domestic violence:
Peoria Journal Star (Jan. 4, 2014)
In Greensboro North Carolina, 11 of 23 homicides
during the year of 2013 were domestic homicides: over half of the murders for
the year.
Murder in the home, by a person who 'loves' you, is one of the worst breaches of peace and security there can be; because if you are not safe at home-then where?
Saturday, January 4, 2014
A New Breed of Killers: Family Annihilators by Sara Niles
Mass shootings, spree killings, and family homicide
appear to have reached alarming levels in the United States, if the national
news is any indication.
Mass murder by the FBI serial murder typology
is the murder of four or more people at one time, occurs in the United States
every 2 weeks, and incidences of mass shootings appear to be on the increase, with
over 20 having made the national news during Obama's presidency alone.
It is both frightening and awful that strangers kill
strangers, who have done nothing to harm them; yet it is even more alarming to
see family kill family, in mass shootings, and targeting acts of murder that includes
children. The annihilation of one’s own family has become so commonplace, that
a term was coined in order to label it: ‘family annihilator’.
The coining of the term “family annihilator” which
has been used on television programs such as Criminal Minds has been credited to Park Dietz
Park Dietz the famed forensic psychiatrist who testified in high profile cases such as
that of Jeffrey Dahmer, The Unabomber and Andrea Yates; usually on the side of
the prosecution.
A man or woman, who chooses to commit mass murder,
serial murder, or spree murder, is usually a violent societal deviant; and in
the absence of mental illness, such people are extremely ego-centric and often
narcissistic individuals who expect the world to satisfy their needs.
Regardless of whether their particular ‘world’ is comprised of one person, or
includes groups and subgroups, these people feel entitled to wreak vengeance
upon the center of their world, if they are pushed far enough. They feel entitled
to commit murder as a final act of perverted vengeance, and they often do not
have the type family bonds that prevent them from doing harm to even the most
innocent of victims, their own children.
In domestic violence situations, sometimes a family annihilator steps
out of his or her own dark world and invades ours. The FBI definition of a mass
murder is the killing of four or more people (not counting the killer), and a
family annihilator kills close relatives, even his or her own children.
Two days after Christmas, this past year, on
December 27th, 2013, in Lockport, LA, Ben Freeman killed his newest
wife, then proceeds to his ex-wife’s parent’s home, where he kills his former
mother in law, shoots two other former in-laws, and proceeds to a third destination
and kills another person; bringing the total injured and killed to seven, by the end of his rampage:rampage
There have been many cases like Freeman’s, some much
worse, such as the family killing spree of James Rupert in 1975, in which he
killed 11 family members on Easter Sunday, the Easter Sunday Massacre
On Christmas Day, 2011, in Grapevine Texas, a man
dressed himself as Santa and killed six
of his family members during a Christmas party, before killing himself: Father Kills family dressed as Santa
It is most likely Freeman expected to kill his
former wife and his children, but they were not home. The individual, who can
murder family members and especially their own children, is a strange monster
in society; an aberration of a human so far removed from normal, that they
become fascinating in their deviance. People want to know why a person can do
such a horrible thing, and what type person can obtain educations, like normal
people, ambitiously pursue careers, like normal people, and impress their friends
and co-workers-once again-like normal people; yet be so far from normal.
The FBI identified traits that are common among serial murderers that also fit into Dr.
Robert Hare’s Psychopathy Check-List, revised (PCL-R), and those traits are
also held in common with many individuals with a pattern of extreme domestic
violence: charm, exaggerated sense of self-worth,
lack of true empathy, and resistance to the acceptance of blame ; among a
plethora of other traits.
These men or women are great actors, who manage to
take on the role of being a caring and giving person, a romantic, and a devoted
parent; when in fact, the deep love of others that gives such a role
legitimacy, is sadly missing. By the time the victims discover this
discrepancy, the abuser is heavily invested in the relationship and refuses to
let go. They tend to delude themselves into a feeling of being wronged by
others, and become obsessed with the idea of punishing those who have wronged
them, at all costs. Once men, or women like this reach the point of no return,
their own emotional ‘tipping point’, it is often too late, because they set out
to kill.
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
I'll Be Missing You (Shenoa Kinshasa Thompson born Jan. 1st 1980; 1980-2013)
Shenoa loved this song by Puff Daddy and Faith Evans:
Sunday, December 29, 2013
The Great Minimum Wage Hike of 2014 By Sara Niles
The Great Depression was the greatest economic disaster in
America. It began with the crash of the stock market on ‘Black Tuesday’ in
1929, and by the early 1930’s, it was in full swing. The Grapes of Wrath, written
by Nobel Prize winning author John Steinbeck, painted a fictional story of
lives that were all too real for people who lived the tale that Steinbeck recreated
through the Joad family’s desperate attempt to survive. The ‘grapes’ of
prosperity, that is the work and prosperity the family hoped to find when they
reached the grape orchards in California, became the ‘Grapes of Wrath’, by the
time they reached their destination. Economic strife, hardship and the societal
turmoil of a frustrated generation, paved the way for a New Day, when
Eisenhower moved to enact ‘New Deal’ legislation that provided economic stability
for the banks, and welfare programs for the poor, social security for the aged and
sick, and a brand new minimum wage:Franklin D. Roosevelt's post depression Programs
The first minimum wage started out at a whopping $.25 an
hour in 1938, was $1.60 per hour in 1968 (I remember those years), and finally,
reached $5.15 an hour in 1997. The wage increases came in minute increments,
while the runaway economy raced out of control; with inflation consuming the
wages of families, to the point of totally eliminating what was once called ‘disposable
income’. Every penny and dollar of the working poor was going to basic minimum,
and often substandard survival.
Until now, when a substantial increase of the minimum wage
is on our doorsteps.
The U.S. minimum wage due to be increased in 13 states on
January 1st. 2014:
The U.S. minimum wage history:
U.S. Department of Labor: Minimum Wage history chart
How will this affect the economy? One can only wait to see.
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