ABOUT Sara Niles

I write to make a difference, therefore my writing is mission oriented and imbued with a deeper purpose because of my traumatic life experiences. I write primarily nonfiction that exemplifies mans inhumanity to man, focusing of the triumphant human spirit within us all.

In Torn From the Inside Out, I call this "The power of the human spirit under fire".

Everyone wants to be happy, and everyone wants to be free; yet, suffering abounds worldwide. The injustice of man against man, is no where more unjust than in the home, where brutality abounds through domestic violence. Domestic Violence must be stopped, and if not stopped, at least, slowed. In any case, it must be fought. We were all born free with the right to happiness.

"Man is born free, and everywhere he is in chains" Jean Jacques Rousseau

My memoir, Torn From the Inside Out, is a testament to the power of the human spirit under fire.

The Effects of Dysfunction and Domestic Violence are both primary, and secondary in nature, and for many, last a lifetime.

The internal pain caused by childhood abuse, becomes externalized through the triple threats of mental illness, trauma issues, and damaging addictions. I call this triple effect the 'Three Headed Monster'.

Hardback edition of Torn From the Inside Out:

Barnes and Noble

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/torn-from-the-inside-out-sara-niles/

Other editions available via Amazon, Createspace, Smashwords , Kobo, and many others. Simply search Sara Niles.

The Face of Dysfunction

Dysfunction Within Families Breeds Dysfunction

Stopping dysfunction in its original form will prevent generational impact that affects individuals, families and society as a whole.

I spent thousands of hours examining people's lives under the microscope of counseling and I continue to see repetitions of the same underlying themes in almost every family. Healthy families beget healthy families and sick families beget families with many of the same sick dysfunctions that they experienced as children. Young boys and girls whose family role models were womanizers or man-users usually womanize or abuse and dispose of men, those whose models drank, usually have a substance abuse problem and those who grew up with hurt, pain, and abuse, usually inflict it upon their families in the same measure, over fifty percent of the time, or they may invariably find a partner who inflicts pain upon them. There are a rare few who escape this repetitive cycle, even though they were raised in it, but they are the exception. Many will marry the negative image of their parent or their opposite in an attempt to recreate what 'love' felt like and looked like to them as a child.

No matter how the child interprets it, when the family model is corrupted then the copy is corrupted. A very wise man that I greatly admired and who was a teacher and trainer once said there was a grandmother who baked a turkey with the edges cut off and both her daughters and granddaughters also baked their turkeys with the edges cut off. When someone asked the granddaughter why she baked her turkey with the edges cut off, she replied because her mother did it that way. When the mother was asked, she replied 'because my mother did it that way' and when the grandmother was asked, she said that she always had a pan that was too small for the turkey so she started trimming the edges so it would fit into the pan.

Dysfunction only needs to operate the first time, the rest will follow. We need to stop dysfunction where it starts in the first family, with the first children. If dysfunction by chance escapes detection, then stop it where you find it.

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

The U.S. Immigration Dilemma is Here and Now

The Immigration Dilemma in the United States and American Roots

The United States of America was born as a result of the blood sweat and tears of former immigrants who sought out a new land. When the first ‘Americans’ set foot on the new land, the natives occupying the land were the only ‘non’ immigrants, everyone else came from England, different countries in Europe, from forced capture from Africa, and from almost every land in the world, so by the year 2014, America is a true melting pot of nations and cultures. The problem with immigration is not so much that there are immigrants still seeking out American soil, the problem is with keeping legal order so that the borders are not flooded with undocumented immigrants who have no legal right to be here. The U.S. has to keep order, or else situations like the case of hundreds of children being placed at risk crossing the desert and vulnerable to the whim of criminals, will become the new norm.

The immigration situation is filled with complications .Many the children that are currently detained by the United  States , were  running away from  dangerous situations and could face death if returned to their native soil; thus placing the U.S. in a no-win situation. The human thing to do is to protect the children by not returning them to ‘certain death’ as O’Malley stated: 

The legal thing to do is to honor American legislation involving immigration, and send the children back. Some believe the children should not be here at all and are protesting their arrival, and some are protesting the possible deportation of these illegal immigrants. What to do? Stick to the law or act humanely? The question is no longer a practice in rhetoric, the question has to be answered immediately because the problem is here and now.
Arizona Immigrant Children:

It may be wise to reflect upon the roots of American origins before making a hasty decision, for example there were many icons that became American legends, who were first immigrants before they became American citizens. Many have contributed richness to our culture, and some have directly changed politics, science and law.

Famous American Immigrants

Fred Astaire’s father, Frederic Austerlitz (the last name Astaire was an attempt to Americanize the last name Austerlitz), arrived in American via Ellis Island in 1892).
Albert Einstein was born in Germany in 1879 and arrived in the United States just as Hitler came to power and began his campaign against Jews; Einstein was visiting in the U.S. and decided not to return to Germany, since he was Jewish and would have surely become a target of the Nazi regime. It was after Einstein made the decision not to return to Germany that he discovered his name was on a Nazi ‘hit’ list. Einstein became an American citizen in 1940.Einstein revolutionized the world of physics with his clarification of the relationship between energy and matter, E=MC2
Arnold Schwarzenegger, the former governor of California, was born in Austria and came to the United States as a body builder in 1921. Schwarzenegger was considered the most famous immigrant in America. Schwarzenegger became a U.S. citizen in 1983.

To name a few more famous U.S. immigrants: Henry Kissinger, Sophia Loren, and Yao Ming
The White House Immigration Reform Plan: http://www.whitehouse.gov/issues/immigration