Culture and Domestic Violence

The larger culture adopts beliefs and attitudes, platitudes, and apathetic stances that work against the eradication of sexual victimization of all humans. Men, women and children, both male and female children, have been and continue to be sexually exploited and abused at an alarming rate. When domestic violence preventative actions, and intervention programs operate aggressively with the backing of organizations such as Its On Us (ItsOnUs.org), public awareness and individual responsibility is raised. Each person has a responsibility to do what he or she can to prevent the sexual exploitation of children, teenagers and adults of both genders, even if this action is only a change of attitude toward this dangerous epidemic. Sexual abuse of children leads to a high degree of dysfunction as adults, especially when society blames and shames the victim so that abuse is kept secret when it should be exposed and dealt with. Society must stop shaming victims. Its On Us.http://itsonus.org/#pledgeTake the Its On Us Pledge

Danger in the Home: Mother kills children

The type of domestic violence abusers who are willing to end life, do not value life.
Obsessive and controlling people who are usually laden with past issues, are self-centered, or egocentric, only value their own needs and emotions over the needs and emotions of others. Those who kill never held the strong values of the dominant culture: do not kill and do not wrong others, being paramount. Abusers of this nature exhibit red flag warning signs.

Abusers come in all forms, genders, and socioeconomic statuses. The most common denominator for seriously abusive people, is they desire to control their world to the point of obsession; if they can't have what they want, then no one can...at least no one in their immediate world.This type of abuser is usually egocentric, self-absorbed and autonomously insecure. Although most murders of female partners and of children in a family unit by domestic abusers are male perpetrated, female abusers commit similar atrocities. Domestic violence killers are not always men,such as in this case of a female who killed her own child in order to punish the child's father. If cases like this were rare there would not be a major societal problem concerning domestic violence and domestic homicide; unfortunately, these cases are common across the United States, Canada and the United Kingdom.

Domestic violence takes the lives of thousands of men, women, and children each year, and will continue to do so until the tide of this disastrous trend is staunched. Domestic violence begins before the first abusive word of emotional assault is hurled, and before the first slap or fist punch. In most cases, abuse begins with abuse.

The reciprocal effect of adults with a history of abuse as children is that it becomes a risk factor that exacerbates the likelihood they will also abuse their children. Abuse often predicates abuse, as learned behavior compounds traumatic childhoods in adults with poor stress management skills. Other factors that lead to serious child maltreatment and even murder, include environmental stress, poverty and lack of support systems. The breeding ground for domestic violence begins in a history of domestic violence. The cultural climate of domestic violence can be changed by raising public awareness through education, and by slowing the spread of dysfunction and abuse within families through prevention and intervention. In order to weed out domestic violence and slow its effects upon families and society, we need to change the climate in which domestic abuse grows.

Benjamin Watson's Ferguson Post

 "At some point while I was playing or preparing to play Monday Night Football, the news broke about the Ferguson Decision. After trying to figure out how I felt, I decided to write it down. Here are my thoughts:
I'M ANGRY because the stories of injustice that have been passed down for generations seem to be continuing before our very eyes.
Read more:

NFL's Benjamin Watson's Ferguson Post goes viral

Domestic Violence: A Societal Issue? by Sara NIles

By Sara Niles author of Torn From the Inside Out

Is Domestic Dysfunction and Domestic Violence a Societal Issue? In other words, does the societal beliefs and attitudes fostered within a culture, affect how domestic violence is treated as a social and legal issue, and does it affect how domestic dysfunction is  cyclically perpetuated from generation to generation? Attitudes help form beliefs and beliefs perpetuate atttitudes.

People tend to examine the world from their own points of reference, which limits their understanding of some issues-that is-if they did not experience it to the same degree then they many not understand it-that in turn, limits the empathetic response and encourages apathy.

Another societal problem with abuse is that many former victims of childhood abuse think they need not think about it again-just move on, stuff it, and pretend it did not happen.This does not fix the problem with the individual, and it does not improve the collective health of society-instead it fosters the 'sweep-it-under-the rug' societal state of denial.

In addition to societal denial,there is societal 'projection' in which the victim is blamed for being 'stupid'....and of course if you can believe that what happened to 'the victim' happened only because they were stupid, then you only have to be 'smart' to not be victimized. The illusion of invulnerability is created and it helps people feel they have control when they say "I would never let that happen to me", not understanding the total dynamic involved. Just as individuals use such tactics to avoid feeling vulnerable-so do collective groups; and eventually, group attitudes become cultural 'norms'...that is what we have now.

In both cases,societal denial and victim blaming- the real issue gets ignored, which is the need to do something to change the cycle of abuse, 
that affects huge numbers of children growing up who will have issues as adults. Changing cultural norms is part of what needs to be done (much like in the situation when slavery existed, and when gay people were considered outcasts).

Domestic abuse is extremely widespread and includes all forms of family dysfunction from emotional and psychological abuse by caretakers of both genders, to sexual and physical abuse.As you both stated-many children are affected and this is a BIG issue in our society.When you consider most people addicted to substances and negative behaviors, were childhood abuse victims-and most people in the prisons were childhood abuse victims-this is an issue of pandemic proportions. It is a societal issue, not just an individual one, and will have to be consistently addressed on a societal level in order to change things.

Public awareness and education is essential to changing public perception. The children absorb societal attitudes-and then the children grow up and become the 'new' society.